Ultima School: KH Style
by Ninja of Thunder
Summary: This is basically a story about what insanity will occur when my school is taken over by random Kingdom Hearts characters. Rated T just in case.
1. The insanity begins

Me: Ok so this is the first chappy of my awesome kh fanfic!

Shadow: Actually its just a random dream that I had and Thunder oh so randomly turned it into a fanfic.

Lightning: Well _**I**_ think its awesome. What's not to love about a story that I am in.

Me: Ok so here goes the randomness.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own kh but I do own all the OCS

Lightning: I resent that! You do NOT own me!

Me: That's what you think.

Shadow: Just start the freaking story already. . .

Me: Touchy much

* * *

It all started out as a normal day (for once in the history of the world).

"Sup Lightning." Greeted Thunder as she walked over to where her best friend was standing. Lightning smiled as she saw her tall, blonde friend approaching.

"Hi." said Lightning in her calm, rational voice.

"Hey did you get that math homework? I didn't understand #13." Thunder asked.

"Yes, the answer was the Inverse property of multiplication." Lightning said with an "I'm so much more smartical than anyone else" look upon her face.

"Wha-?" Thunder responded with a confused, blank expression.

"Why do you even bother going to math class when you don't even know what inverse properties are?" Lightning teased.

"I don't really know. . ." Thunder replied gazing into space.

"Sup ya'll!" Shadow greeted as she arrived at school with her long black hair held back with a headband.

"Sup!"

"Hi." Her friends greeted in turn.

"Whatcha guys talking about?" Shadow asked.

"Inverse properties" Lightning replied with another 'smartical' look.

"Wha-?" Shadow said with a confused expression.

"Oh my goodness!" Lightning exclaimed with an exasperated expression.

"Knock, Knock!!" Shadow said, eager to try the new joke she had learned that morning on her friends.

"Come in!" Thunder replied. "What?" she asked when she saw the looks of pure disbelief on the faces of her two friends.

"You're supposed to say 'who's there'." Lightning explained.

"But why would I say that? I can see its her." Thunder replied confused as to why her friends could not see the logic that was so clearly there (yes that was sarcasm).

"Hi Sunshine!" Shadow said as at that point she saw said person walking towards them.

"Hello munchkins!" Sunshine said with a smirk as he looked at the clearly inferior height of the three friends (at least it was that way for him).

"Hey!!" Shadow yelled, tired of being teased about her shortness everyday.

"I'm _almost_ as tall as you!" Thunder replied, also offended by the height slur.

"You people drive me crazy." Lightning said, almost at wits end already even though she had been at school for exactly 7 minutes and 34 seconds. Luckily at this point the bell rang, signaling the beginning of homeroom. "Thank the Lord!" Tiffany said with a sigh of relief.

It was looking like a completely normal day, but in homeroom, everything changed.

"Hey, I heard we were having subs today. I wonder who we'll get." Tiffany wondered as she walked through the door of her homeroom class.

"Who knows, who cares. As long as we don't have to do work I don't care who we get." Shadow replied uncaringly.

"Let's find out who homeroom is!" Thunder exclaimed with her usual excited-about-everything-no-matter-how-stupid-it-is self. The three then walked into the classroom.

"O.k. if you aren't here then too bad." Said a short kid with spiky blond hair as the late bell rang (free pokey if you can guess who it is).

"Roxas?" Shadow asked, completely confused with the sudden alternate reality she suddenly felt like she was in (yay! Free pokey!). Lightning then raised her hand.

"What." Roxas asked her.

"Aren't you too young to be a teacher?" Lightning asked uncertainly.

"What's your point?" Roxas responded.

"Its illegal to be a teacher unless you're 21 or older." Lightning protested, secretly glad that she had the chance to outsmart a teacher. The bell rang at that point, saving Lightning from the glare Roxas was aiming at her.

"Go to first period." Roxas ordered, turning to write something on the board.

'_yes!!_' Lightning thought grateful for both being saved from sure death and also because first period was Spanish which was an easy class for her.

'_Spanish. Easy._' Shadow thought, of course Spanish was easy for _her_ the bilingual one.

'_No!! Not Spanish_' Thunder despaired, desperately hoping that whoever the sub was wasn't going to collect the homework that she had ignored while playing Chain of Memories the night before.

* * *

Me: Will Thunder be doomed in Spanish class? Will Lightning manage to survive the day? Why isn't Rainbow at school yet? Will Sunshine ever learn not to be gay? Oh the suspense!!

Lightning: You poured extra sugar in your energy drink this morning didn't you?

Me: maybe. . . anywho- plz review and no flamz or I'll just give them to Shadow to make smores with.

Shadow: Yes!! Smores!!!


	2. A Very Pyro Spanish

Me: Yo! I'm actually updating within a 6 month period! This is very good for me!

Lightning: Finally, its about time you finally updated, its been what? A week?

Me: I know, it's a miracle!

Shadow: Just stop your ranting and start the story!

Lightning: Don't be mean. At least she's doing something instead of just staring at the wall like she usually does.

Shadow: Good point. That's all she was doing when I was texting her last night.

Lightning: Just let her type now, I really want to read!!

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Kingdom Hearts. That would be the freaks of nature in Disney and Square Enix.

Lightning: Yes!! Now I can read!!

Me: What are you on woman!

* * *

It was time for Spanish class. Oh joy! Time to find out who this sub is!

"Wonder who this sub will be? Hopefully someone who can understand my obviously superior Spanish knowledge." Shadow says with a smirk while she walks into the classroom.

"Probably another midget who's teaching illegally. . ." Lightning says, still mad about the near-death experience (or at least that's how she thought of it).

"I'm hungry. . ." Thunder said. "What?" she added as she saw the looks her two friends were giving her at her completely unrelated outburst. The bell rang, saving Thunder from more awkward looks from the other two.

"If you aren't here, then you're tardy. Got it memorized? (omg I wonder who it is)" said a man with very bright red hair. A boy with black hair, sticking up in the front walks into the room.

"I'm here! That bell you heard? It was all a clever ruse designed to trick you into thinking I was late." Rainbow yelled.

"O.k. whatever. Open your books to page uh. . .ciento. . .y. . .uh. . .ocho. . how do you say this? Axel says in a slow, highly mispronounced Spanish.

"Ciento y ocho." Shadow says in a perfect Spanish accent.

'_pfft. . .know it all'_ was all Thunder thought.

"Alright, ciento y ocho, got it memorized?" Axel says in a slightly more confident tone. Everyone then opens their books to the correct page.

"Now, repeat after me. Me gusta la comida Mexicana. Wait, what did I just say?" the redhead asked.

"You said you liked Mexican food." Lightning says in an 'I'm so smart' tone of voice.

"Never tried it. Now, me gusta leer. . .now what did I say?"

"You like to read." Lightning says.

"I actually prefer videogames. Unless I lose to myself which I tend to do quite a lot in Chain of Memories. Anyways, Yo quiero ir al cine. Not what did I say?"

"You want to go to the movies."

'_way too smartical' _is all Shadow thinks of this little episode. Much better than Thunder who thought _'I want a cookie'_. The same routine goes on as a two-person conversation between Lightning and Axel. That is until. . .

"O.k., uh. . .Hace viento."

"Pfft, easy, that means. . .uh. . .omg what _does_ it mean?"

"It means that its windy." Shadow answers with a barely hidden smirk aimed at Lightning.

"Its actually very sunny outside. Oh well." Axel says uncaringly, clearly just wanting to leave and play Xbox or something.

'_know it all. . .' _Lightning thought.

'_I wonder when lunch is?'_ Thunder thought with an unmistakably vacant expression on her face.

"O.k. so the nest activity your teacher said to do was to collect the homework." Axel said. There was silence in the room. Dead silence. Not even crickets were sounding. "Anyone have their homework?" The silence wore on. "You students are a disgrace!!" Axel shouts glad for the excuse to completely ignore teaching and actually have an excuse to burn one of the evil textbooks. Lightning then stood in front of the class and recited, "When the Regim ordered that books with dangerous teachings should be publically burned and everywhere oxen were forced to pull crates full of books to the funeral pyre, a dangerous poet one of the best was surprised to find his not on the list. He flew to his table on wings of anger and wrote to those in power: Burn me! Do not treat me in this fashion don't leave me out. Have I not always told the truth? BURN ME!" (Ya this is a poem she had to memorize for Literature and me and Shadow made fun of her for it because she could never say 'burn me' with a straight face but I thought I'd put it in here anyway. Anything wrong in it is her fault by the way because she's the one who wrote it out for me).

"If you say so. . ." Axel said with fire still smoking in his hands, wondering why this crazy girl wanted to be burnt.

"Don't hurt me!!!" Lightning yelled running back to her desk and hiding behind Rainbow who was sitting in front of her.

"O.k. . .?" the pyro answered, confused by the change in Lightning's attitude. The bell then rang.

"Yes! Its finally English!!" Thunder yelled since other than social studies and math (which she hated) English was her best subject. Lightning, meanwhile, was just eager to escape the pyro.

* * *

Me: Ya so, I'm sorry this chapter kinda sucked but I rushed through it because I have midterms in less than a week and a huge project in like every class due tomorrow (insert sad face). So yea, I'll attempt to make the next one better!

Shadow: Unless it results in an epic failure of some sort.

Me: Gee, thanks for the support. Oh and by the way, Lightning is actually a pyro just like Axel!

Lightning: Not true!!

Shadow: Then why is it that you threatened to burn the Black Pearl in Pirates of the Caribbean?

Me: And-gasp-my Kingdom Hearts II game!?

Shadow: Not to mention-

Lightning: Because you wouldn't shut up about those things when I said that!!

Me: So you admit that you're a pyro!

Lightning: What?

Sora: O.k. guys, I don't think these innocent fanfiction readers want to hear this.

Me: Be that way. . . anywho- no flamez plz

Shadow: I will be making more Smores with any flames we get!

Me: Plz review though!! Mostly because my one review from shadowsonicstar is getting lonely.


	3. English Class of Doom

Me: Sup my loyal fanfic readers! I'm actually adding a new chapter now! Mostly because I'm bored enough to actually start typing!

Lightning: Finally! I've been waiting for like two months!

Me: Sorry I was lazy and procrastinated. . .

Lightning: Yea you better be sorry for keeping me, your _best_ friend waiting.

Shadow: Wow. . . you really like to argue a lot. . .

Me: Anywho- here's the not-so-long awaited chappy number 3!

**Warning: In this chapter Lightning gets detention!!! Don't say I didn't warn you.**

Lightning: What!!! I got DETENTION!!??

Shadow: Ha! Finally Miss Perfect gets caught doing something wrong!

Lightning: No!! Why!! My perfect grades!! My permanent record!! Why!!

Me: Ya so here's the chappy, oh yeah. . . disclaimer time.

**Disclaimer:** Trust me, you don't want to know what would happen if I owned Kingdom Hearts.

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~As the Bell Rings~

"I wonder what wonders will await us in this class." Shadow said while innerly laughing at Lightning's near-death experience in Spanish class. Apparently the subs didn't like her as much as the normal teachers all did.

"Hopefully another pyro!" Rainbow said happily with a glare from Lightning.

"I'm so hungry!" Thunder complained.

"Enough with your munchkin-hunger!" Sunshine replied with exasperation.

"I want a cookie!" Thunder said with a smile, picturing her perfect cookie.

"Oh my goodness!" Lightning said. She was _very_ stressed out. She was beyond stress. First she was practically threatened in homeroom, then she was almost burned to death, and to top it all off, Thunder and Rainbow were driving her insane.

"So when's lunch anyway?" Thunder replied oblivious, as always, to her friend's annoyment.

~bell rings~

"Hello! I will be your English teacher today. My name is Ansem the Wise and this is my assistant Ansem." (wow that's not confusing at all) said the man with blonde hair when the class has sat down and stopped talking. (btw I know they kinda wouldn't work together after the whole stealing Ansem's name and locking him in the realm of darkness thing but just pretend)

"I am _not_ your assistant! I have done much more research than you have. You have nothing over me!" the apparently indignant man said.

"Yes you are my assistant, now stop talking to me and let me do my job." Ansem the Wise replied.

"You are not my superior, I know more than you about your own research."

"And who may I ask taught you in the first place?"

"I surpassed you."

"um. . . ok?" Shadow said as she watched the exchange.

"You guys wanna leave?" Rainbow suggested.

"Yes!" Thunder, Shadow, and even Lightning replied. The four teenagers then stood and left the classroom and the oblivious Sunshine behind.

"So what do you guys wanna do now?" Shadow asked once they were safely in the hallway.

"phhft. . .who cares? The point is we're skipping class!" Rainbow replied.

"Skipping class? Even thought that is the funnest thing to do in school and/or meetings, the Superior said he'd crucify me if I don't follow the rules. You four have to go to detention!" said a blonde who turned out to Demyx aka the awesomest member in Organization XIII.

"DETENTION!!!!" Lightning yelled.

"Sweet! We're detention buddies!" Rainbow celebrated.

"SHUT UP RAINBOW!!!!!!!!!" Lightning yelled, completely losing her self-control for the first time in, well, ever actually.

"Does anyone have a cookie?" Thunder asked, not really caring about the situation, or just wasn't even paying attention to her surroundings which was perfectly possible.

"Shut up Thunder!!" Shadow yelled at her blonde friend, completely bored with the whole 'I'm hungry' thing by now.

"See you guys later! I'm supposed to be going to a meeting later so I have to find a good hiding place!" Demyx said with a wave as he walked away.

"We have detention. . ." Lightning said with a depressed aura surrounding her.

"Yes, yes we do. Now on to more important things: How are we going to get back at Sunshine for being way too gay to leave class?" Rainbow said with an evil-scheming look in his eyes.

"Oh, oh!! Pick me!!" Thunder said, eagerly waving her hand in the air.

"Uh. . . Thunder." Rainbow said, playing along with the hyperactive blonde.

"We'll hurt his pride, nationwide, nowhere to hide, humilified, sad inside-"

"Are you done?" Lightning said in annoyance (ya that was stolen from Hannah Montana but I just felt like putting it in).

"Why do you always have to be hatin' on us Lightning? You're so uncool, while you're at school, where kids rule, it's just so cruel" Rainbow defended Thunder with the sole intent of annoying Lightning even further.

"OMG! More rhyming!" Lightning exclaimed, desperately trying to figure out why the hell she hung out with these crazy people.

"Rainbow is right, so don't try to fight, you're much too polite, it'll be alright, but now I want a Sprite." Shadow added with, yes, more rhyming! Lightning just gave up at this point and decided to ignore her friends (not nice Lightning!). That is until Rainbow did something incredibly Rainbow-y and stupid.

"Lightning, I can see, that you and me, are meant to be, now hear my plea, and you'll agree-"

"Shut the hell up Rainbow!!11one" Lightning yelled with a hatred that only appeared when the crazy boy attempted to hit on her (and yes, she was so mad that I had to abandon exclamation points and use the number 1 instead).

"OWWW!!" Rainbow screamed as Lightning hit him on the head with a frying pan. Where she got it, no one knows (or cares because it was kinda funny).

"You got hit on the head, you look half-dead, better believe you bled-" Thunder recited as she held back her laughter at Rainbow's pain.

"We're having a ball, but I must recall, that I really want to go to the mall." Shadow replied, mostly because she still wanted to annoy Lighting with the most ridiculous rhymes she could think of.

"That sounds like fun, now are you done?" Lightning replied as she prepared her shopaholic-ness for a trip to the mall after school. Poor Lightning didn't even notice that she had just made one of her own hated rhymes. Poor Lightning, her friend's were truly driving her insane. Luckily for Lighting, the bell rang at that moment.

"Yes! We have math next!" Lighting exclaimed, completely forgetting her wrath of 10 seconds ago with the assurance that her favorite subject (except for science) was next. Meanwhile, Thunder, Shadow, and Rainbow made no attempt to stifle their groans as they awaited the torture that would surely come. Now let's see how Sunshine is doing!

_In the English class of no return and confused identities. . ._

"If you remember correctly, it was I who discovered how the heart works."

"But I was the one who discovered the process of creating the Heartless."

"You failed to discover the consequence this would have, especially taking into consideration the Nobodies."

"That's it! I quit! You are clearly delusional and have no idea what you're even talking about!"

"O.k., class is dismiss- wait, where is everyone?" Ansem the Trippin' (I mean, the WISE) said with a shocked look at the empty desks and the lone student in the front of the room.

"I have no idea where those whippersnappers are!" Sunshine replied, surprised, as he finally figured out that he was the only person in the room with the two rape- I mean TEACHERS (seriously, where was he through all of this?).

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Me: Yes! It is done! I feel so accomplished!

Vexen: Why? All you achieved here was to waste your time typing instead of applying yourself like you should be.

Me: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE!!??

Vexen: I was under the assumption that you were writing a fanfiction about Kingdom Hearts and I wanted to be sure that you represent me well and do not slander my name.

Me: Great idea!

Axel: I think that you're going to regret this conversation Vexy.

Me: Yea so ignoring them-

Axel & Vexen: Hey!

Me: next chappy is obviously math. Also, plz review! I will update faster if you do!

Lightning: Now start typing!

Shadow: Gosh, pushy much?

Lightning: I have to know what happens!

Me: What will happen? How will Lightning react to her detention? Will Sunshine get detention now? Will anyone ever stop rhyming? When will our favorite keyblade hero come in? Find out on the next episode of 'My Fanfic is Better that Yours'!

Shadow: Wow, you're being nice. . .

Me: Ya! So anywho- REVIEW!!


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